Andy the Smartphone – Dirty (Part 1 of 3)

Chapter 1 – Dirty

Andy laid back on the desk, looking up at the ceiling of Doctor M. Mobile’s office.  Even though the doctor was a well-respected psychiatrist specializing in smart phone issues, Andy was still nervous as he lay there.

Andy – “Do you mind if I plug in?” “I’m exhausted.”

Dr. Mobile – “Sure, go ahead. Make yourself comfortable”.

The white smart phone plugged a power cord into his port and his power meter showed a sigh of relief.

Dr. Mobile – “What brings you in today, Andy?”

Andy – “Well doc… if I’m being honest with myself, I guess I’ve been feeling really dirty lately.”

Dr. Mobile – “Dirty? Interesting. Please explain…”

Andy – “Well… my owner always keeps me in her pocket. I ride around in there all day with the lint, the dirt, the receipts, and the gum. It gets caked on my bezel and jammed into my buttons. It’s just nasty.”

Dr. Mobile – “Hmmm. Maybe this… dirty feeling… is something that’s been passed down to you. Tell me a little about your parents.”

Andy – “Well, mom and dad were both flip phones so they just don’t understand. Their faces were always protected and always tucked inside. Not like mine. It’s out there in the open. My owner is even too cheap to get me a screen protector.”

Dr. Mobile – “So, does your owner ever clean you?”

Andy – “Clean me?! Well, if you call dropping me in the toilet clean, then yes. Otherwise, that would be a big no. Being pressed up against someone’s greasy cheek for 20 minutes or having fingers that just touched fast food swiping all over your face… it can really wear on you.”

Dr. Mobile – “So how do you deal with all the dirtiness? Deep down inside, how do you cope with this issue?”

Andy paused and thought for a moment. Then his LED turned green and he replied….


Andy – “I have to go Doc. My owner needs me for Candy Crush.”


Stay tuned next week for “Chapter 2 – Bloatedof the three part series in Andy the Smartphone.